This constant tussle between men and women has seen no end. Women are hell-bent on showing the world they are just as tough as men, if not more. And I completely agree with that! In my experience, men indeed are the weaker sex and girls truly do run the world in real life and not just in Beyonce’s song.
Men Or Women, Who Is The Weaker Sex?
Being a feminist myself, it is technically wrong for me to consider either sex weak because feminism is all about understanding that men and women walk on equal ground. Yes, all of those of you who think feminism is just a woman’s cry for help, remember that feminism benefits men too. But I’m going to take a quick detour from my own thought process and give you a glimpse into how I completely disagree with the women are the weaker sex argument. Women don’t need our help because a lot of things do go their way. Confused, let me show you how. I would like to share some of my personal experiences as far as relationships with the proverbial ‘weaker’ sex’ are concerned.
1. Natasha Singh, 31
After having spent two months drinking over-priced, insipid coffee and watching almost every other movie together, we graduated to more sought-after late-night drinking sessions when finally one fine Sunday morning I surprised Natasha by barging into her house with an enviable bouquet of roses and home-made tea that would serve as our bed-tea. She confessed that this was by far the most romantic gesture that she had experienced. I also wanted to confess that I almost failed to recognize her without makeup but wisely kept quiet. By late afternoon, we had graduated to intimate lovers and both of us were in bliss. We had our first fight – rather disagreement – because of the grand toilet seat. She came back from the washroom and politely accused me of being insensitive since I failed to lift the toilet seat. I let it go. Later in the evening, she pointed it out again but this time I decided to play the ball back at her suggesting if the toilet seat meant so much then why wasn’t she lifting it after using it? Why should this be a man’s prerogative in a society where both sexes are equal? Suddenly this doe-eyed beauty turned into an aggressive feminist and blamed me for all womankind’s misery and all this over one toilet seat. I rushed home and relieved myself of more than just piss. And people question how men are weak?
2. Pragya Rajput, 27
Pragya was nothing short of a revelation; a perfect blend of beauty and brains, and luckily for me, on the rebound. Adding to her CV was the fact that she felt ‘feminism’ had lost its way as a concept and was now more a means to an end; rather, an end unto itself. She was one of those women who looked as comfortable at a roadside chai-tapri as she was in a restaurant, a real chill pill. Until I started finding my phone light ON, whenever I got back from a loo break. Also, whenever she spotted any women in the vicinity, her volume would go up and she would suddenly turn touchy-feely. It took a while to register that she was obnoxiously possessive and suspicious. And I don’t even understand why partners become possessive! I will admit though, as the weaker sex, to an extent this possessiveness and suspicion did boost my male ego and made me feel wanted, but we weren’t so special to each other just yet and what’s the point of having a girlfriend who behaves like a wife? However, when I did bring it up, I discovered I had opened Pandora’s box. This accusation, according to her, was a clear give-away that I was cheating and that’s why I had a problem with HER checking MY phone and spoiling our relationship! Her tone was shrill and I was sure in a few seconds her well-polished nails would turn into claws. I beat Usain Bolt home. Home sweet home. Thank God for Netflix and whiskey, why complicate life any further?
3. Naina Shah, 34
A well-educated South Bombay girl, half Gujarati-half Punjabi, the perfect candidate for a Big Fat Indian wedding but alas that’s where the problem lay. She had dated the dates, kissed the fools and let the kisses fool her but still no wedding ring to go with her ticking biological clock. In walks ‘yours truly’, and we actually hit it off like Adam and Eve. We were behaving like teenagers. If we weren’t on the phone, then we were flirting over text. If not either, then we would be sitting together, mostly in South Bombay where she would play the tour guide and show me around. In time, I realized, everything was being summed up in the context of ‘us’, ‘we’, ‘ours’ and worryingly everything had a ‘future’. That’s when my present got tense. In one of her happier moments, she mentioned that she was glad I lived in Bombay and she won’t have to bid adieu to her city. I hadn’t yet imagined a happily-ever-after moment but even if I had, Naina had already gone too far for me to play catch-up. Eventually, when the hints finally gave way to straightforward questions – I played dumb and she played me. Played me for what those romantic evenings implied, played me for what those crazy 3-4 hour phone conversations meant or those million WhatsApp messages that we exchanged were for. In all honesty, given the Bombay traffic and her free Jio sim card, phone conversations were the next best thing to meeting every day but I didn’t have the heart to tell Naina that. I was half threatened with a ‘rape’ complaint if marriage was not happening but I knew my Naina; she was desperate but not a bitch, hurt but not by me and she knew it.
Are Women Weaker Than Men?
Clearly not! The world is a woman’s show, and while I’m happy to be part of it and even draw the curtains for them, I just don’t want to be misunderstood, squished and walked all over. As long as my feelings are heard, validated and reciprocated, I’m more than okay with being the weaker sex. In all honesty and jokes apart, I love women and all that they offer to the world. Being a man, I am happy to recognize their sheer brilliance and heart of gold that truly keeps the world going. But Natasha, Pragya and Naina truly gave me a very interesting perspective. How could these independent women be the weaker sex? They taught me, hell no, they can never be. Despite my own problems with them, I have no hard feelings or judgments about any of them. I was and am still sad to not spend more time with any of them. Maybe things would have been different then, but in hindsight, I have serious doubts if this really is a Man’s World!